Poetry

Adrienne Rich died today at the age of 82.

I'm sad that one of the women I really look up to in this world has died. I am even more sad that there is one less poet in this world. One less person to look at the world and write beautiful explanations of life. There are so few poets left and even fewer people who read poetry.

I am at a loss for words. Ai, now Adrienne Rich. My heros are slowly leaving this earth. I am at a loss for words so I will leave you with Rich's instead.

Diving Into the Wreck

First having read the book of myths,
and loaded the camera,
and checked the edge of the knife-blade,
I put on
the body-armor of black rubber
the absurd flippers
the grave and awkward mask.
I am having to do this
not like Cousteau with his
assiduous team
aboard the sun-flooded schooner
but here alone.

There is a ladder.
The ladder is always there
hanging innocently
close to the side of the schooner.
We know what it is for,
we who have used it.
Otherwise
it is a piece of maritime floss
some sundry equipment.

I go down.
Rung after rung and still
the oxygen immerses me
the blue light
the clear atoms
of our human air.
I go down.
My flippers cripple me,
I crawl like an insect down the ladder
and there is no one
to tell me when the ocean
will begin.

First the air is blue and then
it is bluer and then green and then
black I am blacking out and yet
my mask is powerful
it pumps my blood with power
the sea is another story
the sea is not a question of power
I have to learn alone
to turn my body without force
in the deep element.

And now: it is easy to forget
what I came for
among so many who have always
lived here
swaying their crenellated fans
between the reefs
and besides
you breathe differently down here.

I came to explore the wreck.
The words are purposes.
The words are maps.
I came to see the damage that was done
and the treasures that prevail.
I stroke the beam of my lamp
slowly along the flank
of something more permanent
than fish or weed

the thing I came for:
the wreck and not the story of the wreck
the thing itself and not the myth
the drowned face always staring
toward the sun
the evidence of damage
worn by salt and sway into this threadbare beauty
the ribs of the disaster
curving their assertion
among the tentative haunters.

This is the place.
And I am here, the mermaid whose dark hair
streams black, the merman in his armored body.
We circle silently
about the wreck
we dive into the hold.
I am she: I am he

whose drowned face sleeps with open eyes
whose breasts still bear the stress
whose silver, copper, vermeil cargo lies
obscurely inside barrels
half-wedged and left to rot
we are the half-destroyed instruments
that once held to a course
the water-eaten log
the fouled compass

We are, I am, you are
by cowardice or courage
the one who find our way
back to this scene
carrying a knife, a camera
a book of myths
in which
our names do not appear.

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Where I’m From

by Lindsey on September 21, 2011

in Poetry

I am from summers hanging upside down on the monkey bars,
from Oscar Meyer bologna cups and macaroni art.

I am from the suburban safety net of Girl Scouts, ballet classes, and roaming the neighborhood freely as long as I was home by dark.
From bicycles with banana seats and day glow spoke beads.
 
I am from the evergreen pines of Sherwood Forest, the backyard needles with transformative powers to be kindling, jewels, magic potion ingredients.
I am from secret backyard societies of witches or fairies, depending on the day. From closet book clubs and Cabbage Patch mommies.
 
I am from Thanksgivings in Dallas and hating turkey, stuffing, green beans, sweet potatoes, and pecan pie.
From Duncans and Simpsons and Bexar County Adoption Center.
 
I am from the importance of manners, prayers before meals, and not letting others see our faults and mistakes.
From Tulsa, Texas, as my mother called it, and happy chickens are tasty chickens.
 
I’m from Germans, Brits, and Cherokees, spaghetti, fried catfish, and Dr. Pepper as coffee.
 
From “Are we there yet? (That is my song.),” sticky wickies, station wagon carpools.
I am from pigtails, yellow silky blankets, Nancy Drew books.
 
I am from the little girl who wrote a book of poems about animals at seven – and hasn’t stopped writing since.

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Walking Series

by Lindsey on February 11, 2011

in Poetry


Walking Series: 3-6-8

 

“I sometimes want to see myself

as a waking flower”

James Surles once said.

Burns, rubs, and oils

shaped the wooden stalks to

form a mobile contraption.

Twisted steel curled and spiraled

so that it might move.

Feel the freedom

no other plant knows

chained by roots.

 

Creaking of steel and

thumping of wood

off its stand and

outside, where smells

sweet and mingled, fall away.

Their colony is destroyed;

trampled by one who would

be their own.

 

 

 

*This poem was based on this week's Just Write Workshop prompt and the sculpture below.

James Surls
U.S., b. 1943
Walking Series: 3-6-8, 1986
Wood (walnut) and steel
50 x 84 x 56 in.
Gift of Jack Bryan and Judith Warkentin Bryan, 1994

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In the Silence

by Lindsey on January 27, 2011

in Poetry

 




Thursday's mean Mama Kat's Writing Workshop. Yeah! Here is the prompt I chose this week. Read the quote and let it inspire your post: "I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel". -Maya Angelou

 

In the Silence

 

We forgot about the lily and the doves

distracted by the clearing of the dandelions.

 

 

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Oklahoma Winter

by Lindsey on January 20, 2011

in Poetry

I want to imagine it is the ice that keeps me from you,
but it is the water.

Mama's Losin' It

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She Was Waiting to be Told

by Lindsey on October 8, 2010

in Poetry

Because of you she learned to wear stovepipe jeans
and purple lipstick,
how to dye her hair fuscia
then green. She learned to break the rules
and limits you had set. When caught, never take blame.
It’s your fault because, she’d begin, or
I didn’t mean to…
 
She brought home boys
with 6-gauge eyebrow rings
and snake tattoos.
He’s only a friend. I swear.
But she doesn’t ask what you think
because she knows.
 
We all know what you think.
 
She was waiting
to be told she was liked
She wanted to throw away the
ruffled dresses and soft pink blush,
cut her hair pixie short.
In one look, wanted the
awkward girl to disappear
and reappear a woman.


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He Calls Love

by Lindsey on September 24, 2010

in Poetry


For a first step out from the broken world, bandaged with sterile walls, healed from death. A solitary decision. Placed my hands, hesitant, one on his back and one on his chest.

Bracing him. Bracing
me. Walk him step by step in
shoes without laces

Favorite comfort short now name tagged into the chill of November. Take these steps toward home.

You still have a choice.
We can’t go back to the empty.
We still can have time.

Our life painted black. Choose to paint is blue golden white. Smash the dishes. Bang down the pots. Topple the sofa. Eyes in slits seeing only the today and the next today. Come back. Place one hand on your chest and one on your back. Reign in the pain – the loss of yesterday – the loss of last week – the loss of seventeen – the loss of thirteen – the loss of six. Let me hold you as you fall and grieve. As you eyes widen to tomorrow. Breathe out in tears the loss of tomorrow.

In the depth, I will
remain nearby as you mourn
decide to call love

Love. Love. Love. Removes my hand from his chest and the wound drips. Catches in his throat. He calls love. It is time to come home. Paint healing on the skin of our arms.

More Poetry

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Please Fire Me

by Lindsey on September 16, 2010

in Just Sayin',Poetry


Deborah Garrison is the stereotypical 30ish, educated, working woman who thinks that all her problems will be solved when she meets the right man.  In A Working Girl Can’t Win and Other Poems she takes us through the perils of office politics, the sanctity of female friendship, and the trials of finding the right man.  Through her poetry she discovers that even if you do find the right man, all of life’s problems will not miraculously be solved.  Your lousy boss is still a lousy boss, your parents words still echo even after they can’t have any input into your life anymore, and marriage isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

            Deborah Garrison’s confessions, though somewhat disheartening, have become a battle cry for professional single women everywhere.  Her independent mindedness has turned her into a modern heroine and her poems into mantras.  In “Fight Song” she writes:

            Sometimes you have to say it:

            Fuck them all.

 

            Yes fuck them all—

            the artsy posers,

the office blowhards

and brown-nosers;

 

Fuck the type who gets the job done

and the type who stands on principle;

the down-to-earth and understated;

the overhyped and underrated.

 

Everyone who has ever walked out of their house can identify with the frustration of people who make life more difficult for those trying to get ahead and do their job well.  “You can’t be nice to everyone.”   This narrative style is not the symbolist, flowery verse that is what poetry is known for.  It is matter of fact, in your face truth.  Though slightly vulgar at times, her poetry is exactly the thing that poetry needs to bring it down to a level that the majority can understand and appreciate. 

That isn’t to say that her poetry is without the qualities that make a piece of writing poetry and not prose.  The narrative style of the poems just makes it seem so easy a feat to accomplish that many of her literary talents can be overlooked.  “She Was Waiting to Be Told” has sneaking rhymes haunting images.  It is a poem that does what poems are supposed to do: it makes you think.  The poem revolves around the theme that marriage isn’t all its cracked up to be.

For you she learned to wear a short black slip

and red lipstick,

how to order a glass of red wine

and finish it.  She learned to reach out

as if to touch your arm and then not

touch it, changing the subject.

Didn’t you think, she’d begin, or

Weren’t you sorry….

 

            The image of the married woman “behaving herself” in public is powerful.  This woman is sexy, but not confident.  She is an accessory to the man she is with, her husband.  She is present only to make him look good.

            To call your best friends

by their schoolboy names

and give them kisses good-bye,

to look away when they say

Your wife! So your confidence grows.

She doesn’t ask what you want

because she knows.

 

Isn’t that what you think?

 

            Finding the right man doesn’t solve her problems because the woman has lost her

identity.  She has become a part of his world and not an individual.  Her opinion doesn’t count.  Their conversation centers on his ideas and opinion.  The woman in the poem doesn’t even get to tell her own story.  It is told in the third person by an outside observer.  The narrator does take up the cause of this lost woman by presenting this disheartening picture of her marriage.  The final stanza to this poem even takes away the woman’s own body.  It has ceased to become hers and is the property of her husband.

            When actually she was only waiting

to be told Take off your dress

to be stunned, and then do this,

never rehearsed, but perfectly obvious:

in one motion up, over, gone,

the X of her arms crossing and uncrossing,

her face flashing away from you in the fabric

so that you couldn’t say if she was

appearing or disappearing.

 

            This is not the only poem of the collection that focuses of the doldrums of marriage.  3:00 A.M. Comedy” also presents the picture of a woman who is lost in the shadow of her husband. 

            Sometimes it’s funny, the after-hour when

whatever hasn’t happened between us

            hasn’t happened again, and I pretend

 

to be another kind of woman, who spends

the night on the couch in a rage,

on strike for affection—

 

The last woman on earth

who even bothered about sex,

and now I’m nothing but a speck.

 

Lust.  It is a common ground between the women who speak in this collection of poems.  “An Idle Thought” combines the disappointment of marriage and the desire for something more.  Though many of the women in Garrison’s poems have lost their identities to men they are fully aware of the sexual power that they hold.

I am never going to sleep

with Martin Amis

or anyone famous.

At twenty-one I scotched

my chance to be

one of the seductresses

of the century,

a vamp on the rise through the ranks

of literary Gods and military men,

who wouldn’t stop at the President:

she’d take the Pentagon by storm

in halter dress and rhinestone extras,

letting fly the breasts that shatter

crystal—then dump him too,

and break his power-broker heart.

 

Garrison’s women, or in fact Garrison herself, is always questioning the woman that she is, the woman she has become.  She constantly wonder’s if there is something else out there, something else that will fulfill her desires and make her complete.  In the title poem, “A Working Girl Can’t Win,” she laments over what she thinks that will be her lasting legacy.  Is she a slut?  A loyal daughter?  Successful?  Who will she be?  Will anyone read her stories?  Will anyone know who she is?  “Either way, we’ll move on, and she’ll tire/ before long: only her children will grieve/ at the way she was wronged.” 

It seems that nothing can end well, especially with men, but also in the workplace.  “Please Fire Me” combines all of the problems that Garrison encounters in her musings.  She defines her view of men, the workplace, and the world in general, but it isn’t a pretty sight.  It is harsh and realistic.  The woman is undervalued and underappreciated.  Her position in the workplace is perilous.  She is expected to join the rank of men in order to survive, but that is not the nature of women.  She has become trite.  It again expresses a detachment of the woman from the actual place and events, though this time it is a desired separation.  In essence, she gives up and accepts that she can not be a part of the professional male world, though she realizes that it is necessary.

Here comes another alpha male,

and all the other alphas

are snorting and pawing,

kicking up puffs of acrid dust

 

while silly little hens

clatter back and forth

on quivering claws and raise

a titter about the fuss.

 

Here comes another alpha male—

a man’s man, a dealmaker,

hold tanks of liquor,

charms them pantless at lunch:

 

I’ve never been sicker.

Do I have to stare into his eyes

and sympathize?  If I want my job

I do.  Well I think I’m through

 

with the working world,

through with warming eggs

and being Zenlike in my detachment

from all things Ego.

 

I’d like to go

somewhere else entirely,

and I don’t mean

Europe.

 

There is one poem in this collection that is not despairing, but attractive to the 30ish professional woman.  “Long Weekend at Your House” is not a dirge, but a celebration.  In a woman’s life there is one place where the trials of life melt away and everything will be alright.  That place is in the companionship of female friends.  This poem is nostalgic.  The present is intermingled with the past to make a serene escape.  It is a love poem, though not lusty.  It is a poem about wanting to be someone else, though without jealousy.

Strands of wind move

through your house

like the finest blond hair,

like your hair.

 

The porch needs painting

peels its white skin in the sun.

We eat breakfast out here, although

it is nearly fall, and too cold.

 

All this you are heir to.

Of course I want to be you.

Inside the brown spines of books

 

your parents must have read

in their stormiest season.

At night I sink into their bed

and sleep.

 

In this poem the women are together, but there is no animosity, no stress, and no expectation.  They are allowed to just be.  Garrison had to step outside of the professional world and stop looking for the right man to achieve complete comfort and acceptance of the woman she is. 

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Orientation

by Lindsey on August 22, 2010

in Poetry

This week's prompt at The Sunday Creative was orient.


You are driving on ice

When it occurs to you

You are losing control,

Your car is spinning,

And your life flashes before your eyes

As if you were watching a silent picture

Playing in slow motion.

 

You transcend to another place

Found only in your mind

Just before it slowly begins to spin.

Your car takes flight

And glides effortlessly across the ice

As when a hundred starlings lift

And bank together

Before they wheel and drop.

 

Very much like the moment

The rivers seem

To still and stop

Because a storm is coming.

Like the moment just before

A tornado takes hold of your life

And twists everything around

Rearranging the landscapes.

The picture plays in slow motion.

 

But there is no storm.

As life speeds back up

To an extra fast pace

You can regain control

And put the landscape back in its proper location

 

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